I remember writing once that 'I have no need for approval, but I can't stand being recognized as incompetent.

So, this is my standard of evaluation of others.

(1) To begin with, I am not interested in other people's personalities → I am not interested in other people's self-promotion, and I have no approval process for others.

(2) I am interested in other people's abilities → I show (excessive) respect to those who can complete a thing or thing.

-----

It's nothing.

It means 'my values = the standard of values others see.'

I know you might say, "What are you talking about now, Ebata?" but this was quite a discovery for me.

"Eureka!" I'm about to run naked through the streets.

-----

As you may know, I have been feeling depressed lately due to various duties and deadlines.

I kept thinking about why I was in this situation, and the result was that I was frightened by 'the fear that others may have certified me as incompetent.

Criticisms of others come back like boomerangs, just as they are, as values that bind you.

In order not to stab yourself with a knife, you should not point it at others -- but as for me, it is perfectly too late.

I have a "knife" lying everywhere in my blog.

-----

This proves I have been sorting others by "usefulness" and "uselessness."

I think I am a regular 'jerk.'

Still, I don't think of it as 'I hate myself.'

-----

'I did everything in my power, but I didn't quite reach (what I consider to be) my goal. But, well, that's okay then.'

If you have to be serious about it

Your knife will be thrust into you.

It is really.